Dec 24, 2009

My Dream

I guess I just had my first nightmare about teaching.

But who can blame me? I went with my family to my dad's office Christmas party--complete with Christmas carols, the presents game where you draw a number, pick a present, and steal gifts from each other, and "graduating college, eh? What do you plan on doing with your life?" interrogation questions.

My life? I don't know. But I plan on teaching in the near future. The following are actual quotes:

-"Oh! ...Wow. That's... a noble endeavor."
-"Teach high school? ...but why?"
-"Teach for America! I had friends that tried Teach for America! ..They had a hard time.... Yeah.. a really a hard time... uhh... good luck."

And, a quote which I overheard from halfway across the room. They were talking about the woman who sent a death threat to Michelle Obama:

-"She looks completely harmless--like a high school teacher or something... someone that no one would ever take seriously!"

= = =

In my nightmare, I dreamt that the kids tore the classroom apart, tore me apart, and then tore each other apart. Then I dreamt that I time traveled (I'm currently reading The Time Traveler's Wife), visited the me of 2009 and told myself not to ever become a teacher. And then I dreamt that I went on to teach English in Japan to a group of robotic, uniformed schoolchildren.

= ==

I know that I really want to do this. I need to keep telling myself that because it seems that teachers and non-teachers alike are quick to share words of caution. In particular, non-teachers wonder why a soon-to-be college graduate would choose teaching as their first profession, let alone a last-resort profession.

= = =

I really want to do this.

5 comments:

Katey said...

I am currently in my first year of TFA, and I will tell you that, besides the time traveling part, your dream/nightmare might not be so far off. Teaching (and particularly doing TFA) is hard! But it is totally worth it--which is means a lot coming from someone who just had the most insane semester of her life. Good luck and thanks for the post! Check out my blog if you want a little insight into the first year of teaching: http://kateybasye.tumblr.com/tagged/teaching

Eyawn said...

reminds of this post from a long time ago: http://supteach.edublogs.org/2008/08/05/teachers-have-nightmares-too/

it isn't bad now that i'm beyond years 1 & 2, but this stuff def seeps into your sleep.

josh g. said...

For whatever it's worth, I was looking back at a similar question recently:
http://joshg.wordpress.com/2009/12/20/my-interview-question/

I figure, those who can do but think "doing" is life-suckingly dull, teach.

miwo said...

april, you will do it and you can!! this dream/nightmare just shows that you care so deeply about teaching. you are scared but everyone is scared of something they haven't done yet before. but i know you will be an amazing teacher. i wish you were my teacher!!

Kate said...

Dreams are funny but I'm pretty sure they don't mean anything. Have you had the one yet where you forgot you were registered in some class for the whole semester, and now you are going to fail and there's nothing you can do about it? You will. My teacher anxiety dreams are always about not being able to get to class, or being completely unprepared, or screaming at the children.

But listen, if you are having anxiety dreams about it, maybe you are just a little scared. And that's good. Things that are worth doing should scare you a little bit.